CHIDERA AJOKE airs her view on a recent viral video that showed a man assult his girlfriend in a restaurant because she cheated on him.
Watching a recent video of a guy collecting all the gifts he got his girlfriend because he suspected she was cheating, made me cringe.
It also made me objectively consider and question a lot of things; from financial insecurity and dependence, to public harassment, assault and plain disrespect, emotional unavailability, immaturity as well as the place of law and order in the Nigerian societal construct.
It goes without saying that as an individual, you have the free will to do whatever you want, however, you want, and whenever you want within the limits of the law. Except of course you fancy a night or a couple of nights in jail.
So, if as a woman you decide that being financially dependent on a man who obviously has no knowledge on how to treat and value the woman he calls his partner is the right way to go, then no problems. Do and feel free to solely depend on him to finance your favorite wigs, designer bags, shoes, and whatnots.
It becomes utterly despicable when you choose that and also add infidelity to your relationship starter pack because nothing should ever be that complicated. So, pick a struggle and desist from misrepresenting your gender further. Either be a parasitic leech or an impetuous cheat. Please remember to choose wisely as obviously, self-respect has left your chosen group chat.
Now, simply describing the behavior of the supposed boyfriend as appalling and uncouth behavior seems rather harsh, but it’s actually the truth considering the reality of things.
First off, it is a case of public and physical harassment. This is an offense under the law as forcefully pulling off your partner’s wig, shoes and rudely snatching her phone, all constitute forms of physical harassment. Such behavior can not be encouraged regardless of what you may or may not be feeling.
There is a place for self-control as a result of respect for constituted authority. Disregarding that, makes you no better than an out-of-control animal who should either be put behind bars or put down.
This brings me to this question. Where on God’s green earth were the ever-vigilant security personnel? Why didn’t anyone do anything? This really shows the state of things in Nigeria. If an angry man can confidently walk into a privately owned facility in broad daylight and publicly harass an unsuspecting, tax-paying female client in the said facility for a good two minutes, obviously, safety is not the restaurant’s priority and such a facility should be closed down. Simply because nothing was done to diffuse the situation by the security, restaurant staff, management, and even onlookers who chose to stay aloof and enjoy a free show at the expense of the victim.
Yet, there was enough time to pull out a phone and record. This culture of staying on the fence and not speaking up for female harassment victims needs to stop. That is not the Nigerian dream.
Speaking directly to the emotional intelligence and thinking ability of the supposed boyfriend, I’ll say this. Book a therapy session fast, as you evidently need help. How do you rationalize forcefully stripping your girlfriend off of items you got for her in public because she’s out with another man you assumed she’s cheating on you with. Where is the place of self-respect in all of this? Or is it so difficult to understand that gifts have no expiry dates? Also, the anger seen in that video and the countenance of your girlfriend, calls for serious questioning but, I’ll refrain from commenting as I know nothing about your temperament.
Here’s what I do know though. Mr. Boyfriend was in no position to demand the items he gifted his partner because rights of ownership to those items had already been conferred to her the moment she accepted the gifts. Hence, forcefully taking them off of her is not just a case of physical harassment and assault, it also becomes a case of robbery. Plain and simple.
At the end of the day, this video went a long way in showing us behavioral traits we single and searching baby boys and girls should run away from when selecting prospective partners. Simply because no man, regardless of how generous and wealthy he is, deserves to be leached on and cheated on. The same way no babygirl regardless of the crimes she commits deserves to be publicly harassed, humiliated, and robbed.
In light of this, who do you think deserves the Scum cup of honor? The boyfriend or the girlfriend? Do well to air your opinion by dropping a comment below.